Best Monologue Joke Ever

From David Letterman:

“Here’s more good news about the health care reform bill: It covers the Kansas Jayhawks choking.”

Oh My: Bryce Brown To Kansas State?

Bill Snyder, the Living Legend, could get another boost in talent for the 2011 school year.

Earlier this month, Arthur Brown, the No. 6 recruit in the 2008 ESPNU 150 and the top linebacker, transferred from Miami to Kansas State.

Now his brother, Bryce Brown, could follow. Bryce Brown, the No. 9 recruit in the 2009 ESPNU 150 and the No. 2 running back, spent last season at Tennessee. But coach Derek Dooley said Brown was, at least for the moment, “not a part of the team,” as the Vols began spring practice.

A source at Tennessee told ESPN’s Bruce Feldman that didn’t mean he was gone for good yet.

But a return closer to home to play with his brother would seem a likely destination. The Brown brothers played together at Wichita East, about 130 miles south of Manhattan, Kan.

Landing both Brown brothers would be an interesting coup for Kansas State. Suddenly, this team could have play-makers on both sides of the ball. While there is some work to be done, Kansas State is starting to look really salty for 2011.

15 Years Ago Today

This:

These Teams Won’t Win The World Series

A million blogs are making their post-season predictions division by division. I’ll do it a little differently.

Here are the list of teams I can guarantee won’t win the World Series. If one of these teams wins the World Series, I’ll do something to commemorate it.

One by one, in no special order:

• Baltimore: The Orioles are actually talented in some areas of the field. But they play in a LOADED division with Boston, New York and Tampa Bay. Not good.
• Toronto: They traded away their best player. They also play in the same division as Baltimore and those three other teams. Done.
• Tampa Bay DEVIL RAYS: The lineup is awesome. The outfield talent is awesome. But the pitching is fringy average. The starting rotation is not as good as Boston and New York and because of that, they’re on the list.
• Kansas City Royals: A talented minor league system is a few years ago. But for now, Zack Greinke and Joakim Soria are not enough. End of story.
• Detroit Tigers: It appears the Tigers are going a little young and because of that, I’ll stick them on this list.
• Chicago White Sox: A team that might steal the division won’t do much once in the playoffs.
• Cleveland Indians: A complete nuclear attack on the major league team last season. Like the Royals and Tigers, it’s rebuilding time in Cleveland.
• Oakland A’s: Billy Beane is still a STUD general manager, but the young guns they have are one year away. Two years from now, Oakland will be a World Series contender. Key phrase: Two years from now.
• Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim: I still love their organization, but I think they’ve lost a little too much over the offseason. Don’t think they’ll make another run.
• Seattle Mariners: While they are my pick to win the American League West because of the acquisition of Cliff Lee, I’m not sold on them to make a deep run into the playoffs.
• Texas Rangers: On paper, they made some solid moves. Rich Harden can either be a great signing or one that will backfire tremendously. I’m leaning towards the latter.
• Florida Marlins: There’s some great talent on this team, but I’m not sure they are a complete team. They won’t win the World Series.
• Atlanta Braves: “Win one for the Cox” won’t happen this year. They might be better than last year, but the lineup is either old or full of guys who have not proven themselves.
• New York Mets: Each year, they make a free agency splash. Each year, they fall off a cliff during the regular season. This season will not be different
• Washington Nationals: No
• Pittsburgh Pirates: No, but I like what they’re doing by trading all of their best players for minor league talent.
• Milwaukee Brewers: Like the lineup, but I’m concerned about their pitching. Don’t like them to do too much this season.
• Cincinnati Reds: Quite possibly the most boring team in baseball. They won’t win the World Series.
• Houston Astros: They are too far away from the St. Louis Cardinals, who’ll run away with the division.
• Chicago Cubs: I’ll believe it when I see it. I don’t care who is on their team. They are still the Cubs and doom is the only option on the table.
• St. Louis Cardinals: This one will get some eyeballs because the Cardinals are a trendy NL favorite. But outside of Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright, their pitching sucks and the rotation is not set for a seven-game series. Outside of Matt Holliday and some guy named Albert Pujols, I’m not sold at all on the lineup. They have four great players but a bunch of average guys after that. Not a complete team.
• San Diego Padres: They suck really bad and because of them, the Royals will not finish with the league’s worst record.
• Arizona Diamondbacks: Not there yet, although Upton might be the best player in the National League. Unreal what he’s doing at such a young age.
• San Francisco Giants: Love their top two pitchers. Very talented. I don’t like the lineup and this Giants team reminds me of those A’s clubs in the early 2000s. Good to great pitching, but average at best offense. The Giants’ lineup is not a championship one and it won’t get the job done.
• Los Angeles Dodgers: Manny Ramirez is set to leave the Dodgers this season. I don’t like that. Manny will be Manny and the Dodgers will suffer. I think they will take a step back. A big one.
• Colorado Rockies: My second favorite team behind the Royals. They are too young and I’m not sure they have enough pitching to win a world title. I do like them a lot in the National League West.

If you are counting at home – that leaves four teams who I think could win the World Series: The New York Yankees, Boston Red Sox, Minnesota Twins and Philadelphia Phillies.

Right now, I’m leaning on a Phillies-Yankees rematch, with the Phillies winning this time.

Why Obama Was Stupid To Go On Fox News

My first political post on the new blog and I’m defending President Obama. Strange times.

Anyway, the above video from Think Progress (a liberal site) does a good summarizing why President Obama or any other major Democrat should not go on Fox News.

For the record, I feel the same way with MSNBC and Republicans. Obama going on Fox News is like President Bush appearing on Countdown with Keith Olbermann. It’s stupid and serves no purpose.

But let’s get back to Obama and his mistake regarding appearing on Fox News.

As a Democratic president, why appear on Fox News when….

• Glenn Beck: The most important voice in conservative politics right now is employed at the channel.
• Sean Hannity: The second highest rated radio show in America, which leans conservative.
• Bill O’Reilly: The long-time conservative who has the highest rated show in America.
• Greta Van Susteran: Has she been arrested for stalking the Palins’ yet?
• Fox has clearly established itself as the voice of opposition towards Obama and liberal policies. Why do that? Again, it would have been idiotic for McCain or Bush to appear on MSNBC’s prime-time line-up.
• The majority of Fox News’ audience is conservative. An unfortunate reality: Most consumers of media WILL NEVER CHANGE THEIR MINDS. NEVER. I have done extensive studies on this reality, some of which I might post soon.

For the record, just in case there are new readers to this blog, I lean libertarian and did not vote for Obama. This isn’t some liberal hack who worships everything Obama walks on, including water.

But Obama should never again go on Fox News.

It’s a waste of time for him and it’s dangerous for his presidency.

Fox fans will probably defend this as “tough questioning.” Well, it appears “tough questioning” for Fox does not come when a Republican president is interviewed. When a network is very slanted like Fox, it’s time to abandon it.

“People say Michael Jordan saved the NBA. Bullshit! Bullshit! Magic and Bird saved the NBA!”

Larry Bird and Magic Johnson

The quote in the title is by Bryant Gumbel. The Gumbel quote appears in the new “Magic & Larry” documentary airing on HBO.

I caught the documentary last night and it’s a must watch for any sports fan, particularly those of the NBA.

The above quote stands out because many teenagers and younger fans even my age believe that Michael Jordan saved the NBA and the NBA’s been lacking ever since he retired.

It’s non-sense – Magic and Larry saved the NBA.

Things that stood out or I liked in the film:

• The NBA was really in trouble. For those younger, it gives a good historical background on how bad of shape the NBA really was in. Bankruptcy was not out of the realm of possibilities.

• The racial elements expressed in the movie. This was part of why the Magic v. Larry rivalry was so good, even if Magic or Larry did not want to talk on it.

• How competitive each were against each other. Obviously it was known that a rivalry existed. But how obsessed each were against each other was priceless. The fact Bird looked up Magic’s stats each morning in the paper. The fact that Bird getting the NBA Rookie of the Year inspired Magic to go nuts in the decisive game of the 1980 NBA Finals.

• How much of a red ass Larry Bird really was. Being born in 1985 and before the Internet, it blew me away how focused he was and confident he was in his own abilities. And you know what? He had every right to be confident.

• Bird reacting to Magic’s HIV announcement is one of the better parts of the film.

• The fact that Boston’s black population rooted for the Lakers.

But back to the post title: It infuriates me how many think Michael Jordan saved the NBA.

Um, no.

You could argue the NBA was at its worst when Jordan and the Bulls won 6 out of 8 titles. I’d take today’s NBA over that of the mid-1990s NBA when Jordan dominated.

It’s nothing against Jordan but Bird and Johnson were both better than him. Bird was just clutch and had a better overall game. Magic, who I give the slightest of all advantages too head to head, could play five positions on the court.

It’s a great documentary and a reminder of a better time in the NBA and sports.

Don’t Buy The Hype: Midwest Bracket Sets Up Well For KU

One of the bigger talking points from college basketball pundits 24 hours after Selection Sunday is the fact that Kansas got placed in a “loaded bracket” and they’ll have to survive it.

Don’t be fooled – as long as Kansas doesn’t beat itself, the Jayhawks will move on to the Final Four. And quite frankly, there’s not too many scary teams in the bracket.

Don’t get me wrong.

Michigan State with Tom Izzo is always dangerous. If I had to win a big game with equal talent, I’d select Izzo number one as my head coach. Georgetown, a Big East team, can make it to the Final Four. Ohio State looked really good in the Big 10 Final. Tennessee and Oklahoma State, also in the bracket, have already knocked off KU this season.

Also, every bracket should be considered tough, no matter how easy it looks on paper. Upsets happen everywhere as well, so a bracket can fall apart quickly. Remember that big KU-Georgetown regional final that was supposed to happen in 2008? It turned out to be KU-Davidson.

However, it seems to me that Kansas has been at its best when having a “showdown” type of environment with great teams.

• They knocked off a great Kansas State team three times, although the officiating in Manhattan was brutal late and arguably cost the Wildcats the game.

• They destroyed Mizzou twice.

• They defeated solid Big 12 opponents like Texas aTm, Texas, Baylor and other teams. The conference was great this year and it should prepare them.

When it’s mattered most, these Jayhawks have played the best.

The times that the Jayhawks have looked vulnerable is when a team has snuck up on them. Tennessee, who was with I believe six scholarship players, played the game of their lives. Oklahoma State completely outplayed KU.

Cornell was within three stupid possessions of knocking off KU in Lawrence as well.

The Jayhawks are a great team and have more talent than anyone else in the bracket.

To me, the greatest upset threat will actually come from the bracket’s nine-seed in Northern Iowa. It won’t happen, but it reminds me of the So. Illinois game from about three years ago. A “mid-major” team can ugly it up enough to cause problems, but even that might be too much of a stretch.

A team like that could sneak up on the Jayhawks.

Don’t forget about the flaws of some of the other teams – Michigan State stumbled down the stretch and has chemistry problems. Ohio State’s depth is an issue, despite how big a STUD Evan Turner is. Georgetown still lost 10 games, including getting nuked by Southern Florida and Notre Dame. Maryland had some horrible losses and one good win all year – Duke. And I think KU will be a little motivated if Oklahoma State or Tennessee comes across their path.

With it being the tournament, anything can happen.

The fact that a bracket may have been loaded also helps KU. It’s tough to overlook anyone when the national media is saying everything it is about “The Bracket of Death” or “The Bracket from Hell.” Call me crazy, but historically KU has done well in tough brackets. In 2003, they had to go through Duke and Arizona to get to the Final Four. In 1991, they made the Final Four after knocking off a great Indiana team and an even better Arkansas team.

But barring an injury or the Jayhawks just playing awful one night or everything going against them, they get to the Final Four.

A Re-Introduction of Sorts

I’m back.

This time I’m back for good.

In the past two weeks, I’ve found some good assistance on helping me operate The Kansas City Kansan. Because of that, I have time for personal blogging again.

While sports will be an issue I touch on, I’m going a little old school on this blog – going back to my roots of history, politics and entertainment.

Thanks for coming back and this will be the last time I do this.